I won’t say legalize it, cuz it fun to do it illegally

There is tons of songs on/for/about marijuana. However/whichever way you want it to be, on legalization, on the trip, on the side affects etc.etc. Marijuana is nothing more than a shrub, weed and a plant grown like every where if you know how to distinguish it from the other plants, that when smoked or eaten or drank in some cases gives you a high that could take your mind and body to a different state of trance. You seem to feel good and happy (depending upon the condition). It’s totally a different feeling then getting intoxicated with alcohol. In my personal belief everyone should try this drug once in their life but should walk away from it before it controls you.

I won’t deny it but I have done it. Not once not twice but was a frequent user of it. But that was way back. You know when you are in your teens and early youth, you wanna try everything once in your life. It’s a experimental phase in life I would say but I have no regrets, ‘cause I bailed out of it before it took control over me. Those were the days, free, no tensions nothing to look forward or back, no plans for the future, just us and that particular moment of nostalgia.

Why I did it? Was it an experiment to try to get new highs? To forget the stupid love pains, the break ups? Or to rebel against the society and waste our educated minds for the country who was always against the youths and the way we did things? I hated the society for not letting me do the things I wanted to do, I hated the government for not giving us the ample opportunity to mould our future. These were just minor reasons, but mostly I did it, cuz I felt like doin it. I did it for me, cuz it felt good. We did it for fun, plain and simple. We would go to oddest of the place just to get it. I can never forget those days. We were hippies then hahaha. Not giving a shit to the world or the society or the fuckin government. We did it everywhere possible that we could. The only better ways to spend holiday was to get stoned cuz most of the holidays were strikes done by the political parties, so that meant we were barred to go to the streets. What better way to spend a boring day other then to get stoned and wasted hehe. Ya can I blame the government for my once addiction? but then it was just plain fun.

But eventually with time and age one seem to mature and realize that certain things are just a part of life and has to let go off. So I did. One morning I woke up and realized that’s its time to move on from this shit I was into, honestly its evil side was already hugging me. I lost weight like hell, my mind and my thinking power was almost at a halt speed. I didn’t know what the fuck I was doin with my life. So I just quit it didn’t even cut it down. It was sayonara to weed . Now ya very rarely or occasionally I do it, that also just to fit in and give company to people who are doin it. Trust me if you are the only one in the group of smokers not doin it, you’ll totally get lost in their meaningless, stupid and humorous talks.

Now if you ask me, I don’t regret doin it at all but will think twice before doin it now. I’m happy with my clean life. I won’t say legalize it, cuz it fun to do it illegally.

October in a nutshell

October unlike other months wasn’t a very normal month for me. It had lots of ups and downs, with few much unexpected mishaps which were surrounded with a dash of luck from here and there. It started with an unexpected event that happened to me for the first time in my life (well everything happens for the first time), I was mugged at Damai station, broke my finger while trying to get back my wallet, which still is on recovery state, I can’t wait for it to get well as before, so that I can start playing my guitar again. I really miss paying it. But on the other hand thank god with still a bit of luck left with me, those mofo’S didn’t take my walkman, cell phone and my laptop, I must thank god for that. And I also found out that my mom had broken her leg, thank god she’s ok now, and recently my close uncle passed away and before that a friend of mine died in a car crash. L

Well living aside the low times I did have my high times as well. For two years I had been longing to go to Langkawi, and when it happened, I happened to go there twice in two weeks. Now that’s a new record to break hehe. The place is awesome I can go there again and again. The beaches, the sunsets, the nights by the sea, getting drunk and swimming at night and of course the reasonably priced booze’s (ok that I miss a lot). Unforgettable moments by the seven wells waterfalls, cycle ride all the way from pantai cenang to seven wells and back, almost hitting the 50 km mark, well that’s some experience to have ppuufff. Just miss Langkawi.

Had our gig again, after 3 months of break sidewalk Hyphenated was back, performing at our usual hub, Bangkok Connection, this time it wasn’t only us, there were 3 other bands as well. We had a good show; to us it was the best performance that we have done so fa. And now we hope to have more shows. Well then the month kindda ended in high notes, with Halloween parties, it was fun. Talking about Halloween, isn’t it suppose to be scary, especially the customs. Aren’t they supposed to signify gore, ghosts, goblins, vampires, werewolf, and the whole Adam family kind of thing? Bottom line would be to look scary. But what the hell was a guy doin in a KFC guy suit, how the ef is that scary??...more so over there was a guy in traditional Arabic dress...now tell me is that scary?? Or was he trying to show that; people

get scared of me, “I gonna blow all of you up...boomb” ....haha

Oh! Well the month has gone now, let the bygones be bygones, my birthday month is here, hoping for some more luck, maybe even lady luck..hehe.. =)

My finger...just after the day...

miss home... :(

Who doesn’t miss home, everybody does, especially if you’re studying or living in a foreign country. I’m often asked if I miss home or not, off course I miss home. I miss lotta things about home. It’s not that I hate my country I just hate those who govern it and people who follow them and make our lives a living hell each day. Anyway let’s not go there.

Basically what I miss bout home is the morning hours. I just miss those hours. There is a certain aura about those morning hours that I like. But on the other hand, how ironic is it? I’m not at all a morning person. I just hate waking up early in the morning’s, I must be one of those people back home who gets up late among my friends and family. Life starts pretty early back home. And sometimes I find it very annoying when people tell me that I wake up late and how they woke up early and have finished a whole lotta work. Well “I don’t fucking care”. When you woke up and what you did. It’s none of my concerns and you better stay outta main as well. It’s not a fucking race to see who wakes up early or not. I wake up according to my own time table n benefit. But then still I hate waking up in the morning early. Even over here, well that a different scenario, cuz we sleep in the morning hahaha.

Anyway this morning I woke up, well its afternoon though, as I was lying on my bed, my thoughts took me back home. How the mornings used to be. I’m the one who wakes up late. As I wake up I open the certen whose windows are faced to the east and the warm morning sun kisses me. I just love that feeling. I stay there for a while looking at the sun whose rays seem to find me through the gaping of the big tree branches that porches in front of my house. As I finish my morning duties I head to the terrace of my house where my mother has put up a small temple for us. It’s hard to believe but its true back home I do go to my temple and say my prayers. After my morning prayers I head out down stairs to my kitchen where I’m usually greeted with the warmest smile anyone can give, the smile of my mom and what makes my day even better is the cup of tea made from her hand. Oh how I miss that taste and the Breakfast that she always forces me to eat. The morning chit chat with my dad with a cup of tea or sometimes leads to few cups is always fun. We talk about everything politics, sports about my life (well that not my favourite topic tough). And then the warm welcomes that my dogs give my each n every morning, I just love them, the way they anticipate me to wake up every morning is always so emotional. The unconditional love that they show me. Though they have a different way of showing love towards me but I still love it. The way they nibble and bite my arms, the way they lick me, the way they circle around me and the way they jump at me, I just miss them. I just love the morning greeting I get back home. It’s just so warming. May be this is why I miss home in the mornings.

Suicide is the solution

Suicide is the solution

Cut myself to see how much it bleeds

Hit myself to see how much it hurts

Drain the blood till the light runs out

Apocalypse is now

Warmth of cold hearts

Smile of deceptions

Tongue’s of humiliation

Hug of betrayal

Thee heart can’t bear no more

For I shall walk no more

In this land of treachery,

Self annihilation

Suicide is the solution

Touch no rose for it comes with a wrath of thorns

Trust no smell, poison inhale

Tender beauty of an evil seductress

Victim of her black romance

Self annihilation

Suicide is the solution

This is one of first lyrics/poem that i wrote for my band...heard that zul has put music to it...hope it's to my mark...cuz this song is suppose to be very Gothic n dark...lets see how it goes...if not i'll have to change it to my way...it does in someway portray my emotions.

musing on my music..

uummm surprising, I was asked by a friend of mine to play drums for his song. well this aint a bad offer, for i dont count myself to be that good either; i'm justta modest player to be honest. I dont have the technical talent neither do i have a whole lotta skills, cuz i started playing after a long time, i had almost quit on playing drums, i thought that i would never play again in my whole life until like few months ago when me n my friends started a band. well actually i don't have enough time to practice my skills because of my studies. well i think i can be way much better than this if had sufficient time to practice.

Well then how did this all start, good question...hehehe....well as far as my memory carries me,it started a long way back when i was justa kid. Then i didn't know what music was, all i knew back then was it made good sound, i just liked it, memories are vague but i think i got my first guitar when i was around 3-4 yrs old. well guitar was justta another toy then. didn't really make sense to me, until the time i hit puberty. Well music really hit me hard when i was 'bout 10-11yrs old, it hit me like big yellow school bus,it was my first love. I went head over heals for it.But it wasnt until later that i started playing instruments.I mustta have been around 14 yrs old,when i was introduced to a instrument called drums. One of my cousin brother had got it from his friend and he invited me over to see it. This was so new to me, I actually had something to brag about to my friends that i had played the drums,then i didn't know a shit about drumming,really didn't know a shit.I used to sit on it and hit it like a maniac.I accidentally told one of my friends that i knew how to play drums and without my knowledge the words flew around the school that i can play drums...damn...its not like there weren't any one that couldn't play.Senior boys could, I was justta a freshman in high-school.So one of my friends came up to me once n told me play with his band we were pretty young then even to be in a band, for some weird reason i said yes,knowing that i really couldn't play drums.So i had to go to this seniors drums to practice with my band.So i did but spare me the embarrassment i really couldn't play a single fucking beat.I knew nothing seriously.The senior ( who is now a renowned drummer n a percussionist) laughed at me n said few mean stuff to me.I couldn't take it.So i just walked out of the auditorium.That evening i again went to my brothers place n asked his friend to teach me how to play drums.All he taught me that evening was one basic beat,I got so caught up into it that i mastered that beat in few days.Then i didn't have a real drums, so i made up my own drums from biscuit containers and mastered most of the basic beats by myself from it, where ever things made sound i would hit it n try to produce a beat.I had guitars then which I had bought it when i had gone to Hong Kong but then i didn't feel like playing it so much, drums was the instrument.Later my dad got so fed up of me hitting every other thing in the house that he promised me to buy me a drum set if i passed my exams,so I did it n then as promised i got my drum kit. My first ever real drums kit.After that in the next term I showed that i could play drums n that also well. Then the rest is like a history to me.Kept on playing in my schools band,then played where ever i got offers to play.Once ended up in a underground metal band,we were getting somewhere when the members had to go their separate ways to pursue their higher education.Then after that i got pretty busy as well with my studies n work,then i really didn't play drums, didn't have time to think about it until i came to Malaysia to study,after almost staying here for 2yrs now i have a band where i play the drums again. So now i'll juss have to wait and see where my musical journey takes me. IS IT JUSTTA COMMA OR A FULL STOP???....that i'll have to wait and see.... ROCK ON!!!!

first kick...

hey,

This is my first day bloggin n posting stuff on my blog...this is like my first time cuz i havent done this for a really long time...cuz my last blog disappeared...so here i'm again opening my blog again.

Times have really changed a lot since the last time i used to blog.which was bout donno when hehe. Then internet was a huge thing cuz it was so new then...now its like a daily part of everyones life.

Donno how to start now. juss wanna look at my life for the last past 10yrs...where a whole lotta things happened in my life and changed a whole lotta things in my life.Seen myself from a prince to a beggar...learned how to survive with all the odd things in life while being down...how people treat you when your down n how I almost lost everything that i loved and cared for....how money talks n controls your life in some way the other....how foes become your friends and friends become your foes.... fell in love... thought it would last forever but got my heart broken into million pieces ....learned how to spring back to my feet...learned to laugh with a heavy heart....learned to appreciate simple things in life...dropped outta college....try to do something productive but then realized that i needed to finish college so got back to it...n here i'm almost done with my advance diploma in interactive media desgn from raffles deign institute in kl, Malaysia...so far so good...the fight is still on....

the first kick

hi..